Last Wednesday started out like any other Wednesday except that I became acutely aware that I was celebrating having been on Earth for 40 years. I expected to have a meltdown or to develop sudden blindness and new wrinkles on my already sun-drenched face. I was prepared for my abdomen to fall to the floor or a sudden cynicism to take over my usually bright disposition. None of that happened. Many people had waned me that “all hell breaks loose” when you turn 40. There is nothing of the sort to report here. As a matter of fact, I had so much fun turning 40 that I think I might do it every year!! I received an incredible outpouring of love and well-wishing from countless people all day long. People brought me everything from inspirational bookmarks and magnets to an enormous pound cake covered with chocolate butter cream frosting with flowers and candies sprinkled throughout the day. I got my favorite perfume and a collection of shirts, hats, and water bottles with the “Life Is Good” slogan (my all-time favorite) emblazoned on them. There were bottles of champagne and Merlot with chocolate-dipped strawberries to surprise me. Then there were the childhood pictures of me in the newspaper. That’s OK. My little sister will turn 40 soon enough! I know where her baby pictures are. My birthday was one of the best days of my life, and I truly enjoyed all of it. I kept waiting for the downer to hit me, but it didn’t and hasn’t. This week, as a matter of fact, many people have told me that 40 was the best age for them and that the 40’s in general were the heyday.
So why is it that some people absolutely adore the middle of life and others say that turning 40 was the beginning of a downhill slide for them? There is a wisdom that comes as a gift at middle life that should be granted as soon as one graduates from high school. I could have saved myself multitudes of heartaches and a lot of anguish had the wisdom that leads me now been imbedded in me when I was 18. Physical agility, elasticity, flexibility and stamina are the ultimate cost for this wisdom. How fabulous would it be to have the eighteen-year-old body with the 40-year-old mentality? That is my next quest. I suppose that if it weren’t for all of the heartaches and anguish the wisdom wouldn’t have come. So in that light I am also grateful for the rough times.
I think many people suffer when they hit mid-life because they are full of regrets. Trips not taken, words not spoken, things planned but not done pile up after a while and the mountain of regrets seems insurmountable. It becomes easier to focus on the lack in life than it is to focus on how to change that lack into absolute abundance. Believe me when I tell you that your body detects where your focus is. If you focus on aches and pains, guess what? You get more. If you focus on emptiness, the emptiness grows. Filling the voids should be the primary thoughts once you see that time is precious and youth is too. There really is no virtue in self-denial for most of us, and it is all right to pursue what makes you happy. A good friend told me last week that life is too short to do something you don’t want to do. How true that is. It is not too late for anyone to change his or her consciousness into one of abundance and to make a pact with yourself to have no regrets. Whatever it is that you have always wanted to do, wherever it is you have always wanted to go, whatever it is you have always wanted to have, do it, go there, and get it. The best is truly yet to come if that’s the way you choose to look at your life.
If the beginning of the 50th decade of my life is any indication, I am in for the time of my life. My body will have some shaping up to do to keep up with me, but it is definitely possible. Don’t worry about what everyone else thinks as you pursue the life of your dreams. Some people will think you are nuts (yes, a few have thought that about me and my feverish pace), but they will be left behind to ponder the things they regret. The front office manager at our practice, Amy Brown, gave me a quote last week that really says it for me. I’ll close this pontification with it: “Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well-preserved body; but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming, “Wow! What a ride!” Thank you to all who love me. Treat your body and your spirit well.